Ask the Greek God of Style (Vol. 23): The Awkward Stage
Andy Ingram
Q: Dear Greek God of Style, I may be your biggest fan. I have your picture blown up and postered on my ceiling. I collect all your fashion columns. But it's not physical at all. I just really respect your wisdom and intellect. I am curious though, as I imagine your other fans are as well. Being that you are such a complete example of masculinity and fashion, did the Greek God of Style ever have an awkward phase before you became who we know you to be now? Did you ever wear Zubuz? Did you experiment in college?
Aleesa from La Jolla
A: Dear Aleesa,
You pose a very interesting question and one that has not graced the annals of this long history of wisdom.
So, an awkward stage? In short, no and I don't really know what you mean by awkward. It has long been said that men get better with age. True! But I would describe it as a refinement from the wilds of youth.
Sure, there is ultra blonde hair that comes in to accessorize the Mediterranean scruff. The fitted raw denim gives way to a more free, lassiez-faire look. A look that says "I prefer bikinis and speedos on the beach" rather than lumbersexual autumns. Boatneck, head back, off the shoulder with collarbones alight in linens of white. Ahem! Clearly I am thinking of something else.
I digress.
There were days when overalls were the denim of choice. There were road trips to find the perfect shoes. There were burnt umber thrift store corduroys. There were French military mid-thigh jackets. Horizontal stripes worked back then. There were long sideburns and Caesar cuts. Big belt buckles and the perfect flannel with deconstructed sleeves. There was quite a bit of leather. Chain wallets and pins. Jordan Catalano finesse. Secondhand blazers with augmenting wool cuffs. The soul patch. But awkward? Never!
Earlier, you say? Coming into manhood is not easy, I'm told. This man body was sculpted and crafted as if honed from marble, bit by bit, with photo documentation as proof. Pictures though that are not available for general consumption.
Birthed as a boy, metamorphosed into a man. I'm sure some transitional forms were not as desirable as others, but how do you truly grade fine wine? Splendid at first taste in the early years-sweetness and spice. Divine with age. Pure satin on your tongue.